2 nancy

I used gold leaf for the nimbus. It was tricky and I did a clumsy job. Thank you to our friend Brother Kenneth Hosley who counseled that there is a cleansing purpose that the “writer” will experience as he paints. No kidding, Kenneth.

Not all of the stations are ripe with opportunity for self-recrimination. This station, Jesus is Betrayed by Judas, was assigned to me and in the beginning, felt benign….not much to do with me, pain-free. Doing the painting will be the more difficult job. Ha! Inside the caldron of 40 days of Lent, it was my ever-intruding thought and it did “boil and trouble”.

Judas had the reputation as the one who had his hand in the money bag to use for his own purposes. Pilferers suffer from a sense of SCARCITY. Judas, like all the disciples, was offended by the extravagant use of costly perfume poured over Jesus’ head but Judas was the only one to go to the high priest and ask, “what are you willing to give me if I turn him over to you?” Hold on a minute, how did he get from “Hosanna to the son of David” to “what will you give me for him?” Judas didn’t betray in a flash of anger but a plot designed to turn him over for money. He only regretted his decision, after the deed was done.

Contrast Judas’ betrayal with Peter’s and why did Peter live on? Peter betrayed out of SELF PRESERVATION …not just once but 3 times was given an opportunity to choose. What’s the difference? Both are really bad. Peter forgave himself. Judas could not.

Back to “boil and trouble”. I had 40 painting days to consider times when I have betrayed someone and the times when I have been betrayed.
It was pretty awful and I am not finished with…..

Confession
Reconciliation
Forgiveness
Forgiving myself when I fail again, again and again
Forgiving my betrayers

I’m looking forward to Easter